The Twelve Best Free Online Dates of Christmas Time

The Twelve Dates of Xmas

I am publishing a few cryptic status updates on Facebook recently in regards to the many suitors within my crazy dating life. Since heading back online, I had some super weird horror tales (that I’ll conserve for a subsequent entry) however for now, I thought you would enjoy an even more in depth description of this males i am speaking with.

The term is used by me”men” instead loosely!

Suitor # 1: Name: JJ Age: 39 Height: 6’3 Job: Engineer Lives: longer Island OkCupid Match: a disappointing 69% we will call him JJ, mostly for the reason that it’s the nickname just his sibling is permitted to make use of. From someone else, it is hated by him. Kinda anything like me with Kimmy. You can easily phone me personally Kim, Kimberly, or Kimba, but also for the love of all things holy, PLEASE try not to phone me personally Kimmy. (Unless you are my small cousin. He calls me Timmy. Cutest thing ever! ) JJ and I have now been dating for many months. We came across on the internet and their writing hooked me personally above other things. He is exceptionally smart, focused on their work, well look over, super nerdy, and extremely high. Our times have actually included pizza and guy of metal, every single day during the coastline, and a swanky supper with their friends among countless other people. We have been therefore excellent together. We knew We enjoyed him fairly in the beginning, and would cheerfully stop trying my solitary woman status for the genuine relationship with JJ. With me talking to other guys since he isn’t “ready” to be exclusive / committed to me, he said that he’s “totally ok. We occur to understand he wants me to do, than I’ll do it that he is NOT ok with this, but if that’s what. Enter the remaining portion of the Suitors. Reputation: UNKNOWN

Suitor #2: title: My Colleague’s Father’s company Partner’s Son — you might have previously learn about him in the last weblog entry, My husband to be. Age: 29 Height: 6’0 Job: Construction worker everyday Lives: owns their home that is own on Island OkCupid match: No clue, although i might like to learn! My teammate at your workplace desired to set me personally up with # 2 more than a year ago, and through a number of circumstances, we never ever met. He finally got my quantity and now we’ve been texting for a couple of months. We have had a couple of phone that is good, nevertheless the many disappointing thing ended up being he had been a cigarette cigarette smoker. Instant deal breaker in my situation.

Suitor number 3: Name: Dan Age: 38 Height: 6’0 Job: IT for the appropriate company in NYC Lives: Astoria OkCupid Match: 82% Dan and I also had been chatting early in the day come july 1st, before i obtained frightened of males (which actually means i simply did not need to get harmed once again! ) He delivered great communications, saturated in witty remarks and insightful humor. He is smart and simple to speak with making me feel immediately comfortable. I sent Dan this message: “Hey, I’ve got some personal stuff going on right now, so am taking my profile down for a while before I took my profile down for several months. If you are still on here once I reactivate it (which for your benefit i really hope you aren’t), you’re going to be the very first individual I message. ” Would not you realize it, a month or two later on we updated my profile and within a day of signing on, Dan penned in my experience. He stated, “Hey, i am hoping you needed to sort everything out that you took the time. Every couple was checked by me of times to see if perhaps you were online once again. We missed speaking with you. Welcome back. ” And simply that way, Dan and I also began interacting each day. He is also simpler to communicate with now him better that I know. We share loves of bacon, jazz, Cards Against Humanity, new york, farmer’s areas, and nation music. Dan and I also simply just simply take images of y our text and food them to one another on a regular basis. I am called by him through the food store to state things such as ” We have pasta and eggs in the home. Exactly what do we make with that? ” and I also talk him through the aisles to generate one thing delicious. Our very very first telephone call ended up being as he had been wandering the supermarket, and it also felt therefore normal. It felt like us. Reputation: ACTIVE

Suitor no. 4: Name: Steve Age: 32 Height: 5’11 Job: petrol fireplace repairman everyday lives: longer Island (solution eastern) OkCupid Match: 89% Steve and I also began speaing frankly about our provided love of tea. The very first time he texted me, we had both just sat right down to a hot glass of Trader Joe’s Pomegranate White Tea! Of all teas in the field to be consuming at that time, fate tossed us in to the exact exact same steamy glass. We took this as a sign that is good so we had many hour-long calls. Steve provided me with their final title so of course I facebook stalked him. (Sorry people but it is 2013 — knowledge is power! ) There have been a few pictures of him by having a tiny youngster, but he’d never talked about a youngster prior to. His twitter handle had been on the website, and so I seemed that up too. Probably the most tweet that is recent “My crazy bitch of an ex wife whom hates me personally using the fire of a lot of suns is stalking my twitter feed. Get fucking figure! ” There have been a few other explicit tweets about just getting 4 hours per week along with his son, her being psycho, the whole world ass that is generally sucking. I do not judge anybody according to their social media marketing, but that may seem like too baggage that is much me personally to handle straight away. Sorry, Steve. Reputation: ELIMINATED ON THE BASIS OF ANGRY TWEETS

Suitor #12: title: The Pianist Age: 31 Height: 6’0 Job: Concert Pianist and Piano Teacher Lives: brand New Jersey (ugh) OkCupid Match: 93% The Pianist is incredibly achieved, educated, cultured, well look over, and well traveled. He spends almost all of their amount of time in Manhattan and made a decision to reside in nj-new jersey for the view of NYC. He could’ve resided in Brooklyn for the views of y our reasonable skyline, but he prefers the illusion of suburbia amidst the city that is big. He could be additionally an admirer of low priced fuel, low fees, and a variety that is wide of. He plays piano at sets from business activities to parties that are private concert halls. He shows pupils through the youngest protege into the collegiate elite. He’s type and thoughtful and keeps in touch just sufficient therefore me, but not so much as to scare me away that I know he’s thinking of. He is Armenian, that I knew absolutely nothing about except that the Kardashians are Armenian. (i am sorry ahead of time to your whole nation of Armenia that the Kardashian clan may be the only thing we learn about your nation! Actually, i did not even comprehend that much. The Pianist explained! ) He is wonderful to date and I also am extremely excited to make it to understand him better. Reputation: ACTIVE

Suitor #13: Name: Nick the Dick Age: an overgrown adolescent Height: gutter Job: irritating individuals everyday lives: in a dark and dirty destination OkCupid Match: this can be simply absurd Alright, i understand that I said there have been twelve times of xmas, but I experienced to toss this 1 on once and for all measure. Bad, unlucky thirteen. Nick had been charming enough online but whilst the saying goes, “Good in some recoverable format, shit in true to life. ” Nick skipped throughout the texting an element of the on line dating progression and called me the moment he got my quantity. He had been extremely talkative (way too much so! ) and I also could not get yourself a term in edgewise. He said which he does not rely on love being all “doves and butterflies and performing and shit. Love is not that way. It really is crap more often than not. You have simply surely got to find some one it is possible to tolerate. ” He additionally stated that whenever children that are raising “it’s best to simply place a sack over their heads often so that they shut up and listen. Do you know what they do say about physical violence: whether it’s not working, you aren’t making use of an adequate amount of it! ” Last but not least, as he asked just what my weirdest internet dating experience was, we told him in regards to the guy week that is last wished to pee on (with? ) me personally. Nick’s reaction had been “therefore I guess permitting me have a shit you may be out associated with the concern, cause you are a prude? ” Status: ELIMINATED ON THE GROUNDS OF ARE YOU KIDDING that is FUCKING ME.